I hurt my knee on the weekend and have not been able to do anything significant since then. Every step hurts at the moment. I did some easy mobility work yesterday and have been getting treatment, but it's another reminder that recovery is far from linear.
Progress charts are often shown as a relatively straight line, rising at an angle from the bottom, I once believed that’s how we moved towards our goal. But this year has been a reminder that it's not that way at all.
Recovery is many ups and downs and steps backwards, and seeing progress can be difficult. When you’re in the midst of the struggle to gain some footing, it can even feel like a regression. For me, it’s sometimes frustrating and I’ve wanted to give up many times. Hell, sometimes, I don’t even know what it is I’m working towards.
It’s an ideal that I have in my mind that I have to be better than what I am right now and that I should be able to do more, be braver, be stronger, be faster... That there has to be a time and a place where the physical pain that I feel won’t feel so overwhelming and that moving won’t feel so difficult. It’s called hope. It sustains me through my most arduous of times and gives me the strength and resiliency to continue moving forward.
To keep myself motivated, I pause and reflect along my journey to see how far I have actually come. I think about the many highs I have experienced. It’s easy to get lost in the grind of the climb and not appreciate the steps already taken. Pause for a moment and look back. Take notice of the twists and turns that you’ve endured to get to where you are today.
Recognize the strength and courage it took to make it as far as you have. Draw courage from your bravery so far.
Recovery is not a linear process. Accepting this can be critical in helping you along. It can help ease some of the judgement (mostly self-imposed) you feel for experiencing setbacks and relapses when you understand that they happen to everyone and you’re not a failure for having them.
I’ll get to where I need to be. I’m just taking the scenic route!!!